MOTHER’S DAY IS COMING
April 30, 2022
Christmas
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Quick ViewGET YOUR FAT ASS OVER HERE
Cards$5.00Front: The stockings are hung by the mantel with care.
Inside: Now we’re just waiting for Santa’s fat ass. -
Quick ViewHIPPIE DIPPIE BOLOGNA
Cards$5.00Front: Have you picked out your Christmas tree?
Inside: Or are you one of those tree-loving hippies? -
Out Of Stock
Quick View -
Out Of Stock
Quick ViewSANTA’S FAVE STRIP JOINT
Cards$5.00Front: I met Prancer and Vixen.
Inside: They work at a strip joint downtown. -
Quick ViewEXPECT THE BEST
Cards$5.00Front: This Christmas will be great.
Inside: As long as you buy me something fucking amazing. -
Quick ViewCANCEL THIS SHIT
Cards$5.00Front: Did you hear the news?
Inside: Santa died. Christmas is cancelled. -
Out Of Stock
Quick ViewBIG STUPID HEAD
Cards$5.00Front: Have you ever wondered why Rudolph has a red nose?
Inside: It’s just a huge zit. -
Quick ViewCHRISTMAS CHEER
Cards$5.00Front: Sending you some Christmas cheer.
Inside: From a safe fucking distance. -
Quick ViewYOU’RE TOO MUCH
Cards$5.00Front: It’s too bad we can’t spend the holidays together.
Inside: Just kidding. We needed a year off. -
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Quick ViewTRAFFIC STOP
Cards$5.00Front: Have you ever wondered where Santa gets his money?
Inside: It’s from sex trafficking. -
Quick ViewHAPPY WHATEVER
Cards$5.00Front: Happy Holidays.
Inside: Or whatever the fuck we’re supposed to say not to be offensive. -
Quick ViewCARROT WANG
Cards$5.00Front: Frosty was at the winter carnival.
Inside: He was flashing everyone his carrot wang. -
Sale!
Quick View -
Quick ViewGREETING CARD MYSTERY BAG – HOLIDAY EDITION
Box Sets$30.00Holiday Edition Greeting Card Mystery Bags include a random mix of 10 of our (amazing and hilarious) Christmas (and maybe 1 Hanukkah) greeting cards and 10 plain white envelopes for $30 (that’s just $3.00/card)! The contents will differ from one bag to a next and none of the bags will have repeats!
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Quick ViewREINDEER MEAT
Cards$5.00Front: I saw a couple of Santa’s reindeer recently.
Inside: I slaughtered them. Their meat is delicious. -
Quick ViewMERRY CHRISTMAS OR WHATEVER
Cards$5.00Front: We wish you a Merry Christmas.
Inside: Well, some of us do… -
Quick ViewWILD THINGS
Cards$5.00Front: Have you ever wondered what reindeer do on their days off?
Inside: You don’t want to know. It’s wildly inappropriate. -
Quick ViewFOXY CHRISTMAS
Cards$5.00Front: Christmas is all about friends and family.
Inside: It’s too bad that you don’t have either. -
Quick ViewLOST ART FART
Cards$5.00Front: Sending Christmas cards is almost a lost art.
Inside: So you’re an asshole if you don’t return one. -
Quick ViewBAD CREDIT SCORE
Cards$5.00Front: The holiday season is the best.
Back: Until the credit card statement arrives.
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Quick View
GET YOUR FAT ASS OVER HERE
Cards$5.00Front: The stockings are hung by the mantel with care.
Inside: Now we’re just waiting for Santa’s fat ass. -
Quick View
HIPPIE DIPPIE BOLOGNA
Cards$5.00Front: Have you picked out your Christmas tree?
Inside: Or are you one of those tree-loving hippies? -
Out Of StockQuick View
-
Out Of StockQuick View
SANTA’S FAVE STRIP JOINT
Cards$5.00Front: I met Prancer and Vixen.
Inside: They work at a strip joint downtown. -
Quick View
EXPECT THE BEST
Cards$5.00Front: This Christmas will be great.
Inside: As long as you buy me something fucking amazing. -
Quick View
CANCEL THIS SHIT
Cards$5.00Front: Did you hear the news?
Inside: Santa died. Christmas is cancelled. -
Out Of StockQuick View
BIG STUPID HEAD
Cards$5.00Front: Have you ever wondered why Rudolph has a red nose?
Inside: It’s just a huge zit. -
Quick View
CHRISTMAS CHEER
Cards$5.00Front: Sending you some Christmas cheer.
Inside: From a safe fucking distance. -
Quick View
YOU’RE TOO MUCH
Cards$5.00Front: It’s too bad we can’t spend the holidays together.
Inside: Just kidding. We needed a year off. -
Quick View
-
Quick View
-
Quick View
TRAFFIC STOP
Cards$5.00Front: Have you ever wondered where Santa gets his money?
Inside: It’s from sex trafficking. -
Quick View
HAPPY WHATEVER
Cards$5.00Front: Happy Holidays.
Inside: Or whatever the fuck we’re supposed to say not to be offensive. -
Quick View
CARROT WANG
Cards$5.00Front: Frosty was at the winter carnival.
Inside: He was flashing everyone his carrot wang. -
Sale!Quick View
-
Quick View
GREETING CARD MYSTERY BAG – HOLIDAY EDITION
Box Sets$30.00Holiday Edition Greeting Card Mystery Bags include a random mix of 10 of our (amazing and hilarious) Christmas (and maybe 1 Hanukkah) greeting cards and 10 plain white envelopes for $30 (that’s just $3.00/card)! The contents will differ from one bag to a next and none of the bags will have repeats!
-
Quick View
-
Quick View
-
Quick View
REINDEER MEAT
Cards$5.00Front: I saw a couple of Santa’s reindeer recently.
Inside: I slaughtered them. Their meat is delicious. -
Quick View
MERRY CHRISTMAS OR WHATEVER
Cards$5.00Front: We wish you a Merry Christmas.
Inside: Well, some of us do… -
Quick View
WILD THINGS
Cards$5.00Front: Have you ever wondered what reindeer do on their days off?
Inside: You don’t want to know. It’s wildly inappropriate. -
Quick View
FOXY CHRISTMAS
Cards$5.00Front: Christmas is all about friends and family.
Inside: It’s too bad that you don’t have either. -
Quick View
LOST ART FART
Cards$5.00Front: Sending Christmas cards is almost a lost art.
Inside: So you’re an asshole if you don’t return one. -
Quick View
BAD CREDIT SCORE
Cards$5.00Front: The holiday season is the best.
Back: Until the credit card statement arrives.
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